This is tough to answer because each person is different, but here are some general guides: look for good eye contact. Notice if they leave room for your story, instead of jumping to conclusions. See if they make you feel heard by responding with summaries, empathy, or kindness instead of judgment. Note if you feel pressured in any way or feel they are pushing their values onto you. Check into their specialties and make sure it matches your needs as best possible. Above all, a therapist needs to earn your trust. Since trust takes time, ask yourself if this is a person you could grow to trust completely.

A standard therapy session is 45-55 minutes long.

Your therapist needs time to write session notes to stay in compliance with the state standards and to have time to use the bathroom eat their meal and rest their brain with the least inconvenience for you.  This helps them to stay present in order to help you, instead of still thinking about the previous client.

Although this shouldn’t be the norm, therapists by nature are very compassionate people, and do not want to cut you off in the middle of a conversation.  If a client is in the middle of grieving (for example), and the 50 minutes is up, a good therapist will not stop them to say their time us up.  A therapist will allow extra time, and do their best to help the client finish.   It is very much appreciated that all subsequent clients are compassionate and understanding to this very difficult process.

If you have a person in your life who you don’t know how to deal with, if you are going through a situation you find difficult, or have feelings or behaviors you don’t know how to control, then counseling can be a good answer for you.  If you have friends who are encouraging you to go, then it is likely a good idea to at least go for an initial consultation to see what a professional thinks.

According to Forbes, and a number of other research articles, Mental Health issues such as stress, depression and burnout are the number 1 reason people miss work and have health issues.  Missing work is a costly thing, and so is missing out on your own life.  Counseling is very inexpensive when compared to divorce, losing a job, and not being emotionally available for your kids.  If you invest in you, every other area of your life will be better.  You can become happier so your family will feel happier, your stress levels are low so your work becomes much more effective, and you know how to deal with difficult situations so you become a stable force.

When you come to counseling, we work to help you become the best you that you can be.  We help you with your issue, but we also go deep down to the root of the issue so that the whole problem is worked through.  We help you find the best in you in order to deal with all life situations.  We help you become content in any situation.

You can expect to speak openly about your issues, but only to the extent you are willing.  Expect to be honest with your therapist, if you are not you are only wasting your own time.  Expect your therapist to be compassionate but honest with you.  Expect the first 3-6 sessions to be talking about the issue you came to counseling for and background (childhood, what your family was like, any abuse you may have endured, etc.).  You can expect the following appointments to be about working through the deeper issues of the issue you came for.  You can expect to feel like some of the things talked about in therapy to feel like a waste of time, but are vitally important to the process of helping you.  You can expect to want to quit therapy, because it is very difficult.  You can expect results if you work hard at home.  The therapist can give you tools, but you have to go home and use them.

Therapy is a process in which a therapist will help you understand the issue on a level you may not have realized existed.  When this happens, you are expected to utilize the tools your therapist gives you at home.  Using new tools are difficult (habit takes over when under pressure), and we know that.  Change is a long process, but when you use the tools more at home, they become easier, and your life slowly begins to change.  We recently had a client state, “The things you’re telling me to do is so counterintuitive to me and how I’ve done things in the past, but my life is so radically different because I’m using them.  Its insane how they work, but they do!”

When you start changing, the world around you can change as well.  It can change for the better, and for the worse.  Sometimes people don’t like it when you change, so they start becoming resentful against you.  Sometimes you start freeing yourself from the pain you are encountering and therefore have more peace in your life.  Sometimes you don’t know how to why, but you feel more content and at peace with how you are living your life.  That’s when you know its working.

Every person from all walks of life does therapy.  We have had gang members, refugees from other countries, CEOs of major businesses, people with mental health diagnosis, and everywhere in between.  Many college aged people who are having a hard time coping with their school work, wives who struggle with their husbands porn use, and a person who just wants some advise about their kids.  Anybody can use counseling for any issue they may be struggling with.

Counseling can be very calming and relaxing.  It is a safe place where you can tell a person who has no prior knowledge of you, unbiased opinion of you, everything.  Someone who will be on your side and tell you the truth, even if it is hard to hear.  Counseling can be frustrating because it is a lot of work.  It is not a place where you go and talk for an hour then go home and be “cured.”  You need to implement the changes at home.

Anybody can use counseling for any issue they may be struggling with. Many college aged people who are having a hard time coping with their school work, wives who struggle with their husbands porn use, and a person who just wants some advise about their kids. Therapy is for gang members, refugees from other countries, CEOs of major businesses, people with mental health diagnosis, and everywhere in between.

Tons of people start counseling not knowing exactly what the issue really is. You are absolutely welcome to begin therapy without a clear understanding of your problem. That said, you will want some idea of what your discomfort is. For example: “I’m depressed but I have no idea why” is a perfect place to start. Good therapists will help you dig deeper than you thought possible and find the root problem, so it may even be to your advantage to be unsure of the real problem.

Your therapist should be able to help you through this question. Generally speaking, if you feel like you are stuck, with no progress happening, talk to your therapist about what can be done. If you still feel stuck, it might be time to switch therapists. If your initial goal is completed, and no other goals came up in the process, you may be finished with therapy, but remember – always talk to your therapist first before quitting.

The length of counseling is different for everyone and varies greatly, but there are some “typical” timeframes we can share with you:

• For traditional counseling (one-on-one therapy), the first 2-4 sessions are mostly spent gathering information – getting the most accurate picture of the problem as possible. Next, you and your therapist transition into phase two: the healing process. Time spent in this phase varies depending on the number of issues addressed, complexity of the problems, and how directly the client is able to work on these issues. It can take anywhere between three months to one year, or possibly longer.

• For experiential intensives, you can schedule them for anywhere between 3-6 days long. From there you have two options: first, you can use the two complimentary follow up sessions and be finished at that point or, second, you can begin on going traditional therapy. Many people choose this option because it helps capitalize on the positive momentum the intensive has provided.